Monday, 24 December 2012

Eees Chreestmus!!!!!

Herlo everiywunn!

I doez hoppe to fiynd everywun in a furry stayte of wellness!! 

Ees Posiedorg herre, eef yoo awll remembir who I iz, dat iz!! Sniff!  I feel disgrayserfulled att ma compleete andd utter lakk owf bloggerin sinse Septimber!!!  Andd boww ma hedd in shayme!!

Butt therr was noooo ways, nosiree, datt I cood lett ma mosht favrit tiyme owf da yeer comme n go wifthout sendding somme festivve cheer to my amazerin bloggin pals!!
Me n mummer n dadder haz had sooo much funn dowin this bloggy this yeer, andd overhelmid wifth da lovve n friendlyness owf yoo guys, eech andd efurrywun!!!  Nevver cood therr be a bunch of peeps who wellcomme a nyoo wun into therre packk as graytely as yoo guyz did wifth me! So fthanks!!!

I trooly, mosht deeply and sinserrilly wishh yooz awll da mosht merriestt and happeriest Chrimblemas!!! And a grayte grayte Nyoo Yeerz tiyme too!!!

By da ways, sincce lasht we spowke, I has a nyoo addishun to ma famerly!!! Ma wee cussin Matt!! DA GUINEAAA PIGG - NUMMERS!!!!! BURP!  Sommewun lefted him abandonned own ma Auntie S's doorstepp, behinnd her WheelieBin (Garbage bin furr yoo Ameriycans!)!! He was awll matted n hairy n bald bits n his nailys werr overgrowed and he had miytes n fings, butt they mayde him better n keptt him n got him lots owf niyce beddies n playpenns n foodies n nummers! N now he is called Matt -da snuffleybum pig!!! He looks very tashty, see:


He reely iz a grayte cussin tho, n veriy cyoot n funny!!! Butt he doess smell a but liyke hay! heeheehee! He stayz wifth ma auntie S but sumtimes goes upp to visitt at ma Uncel Wes n Bob's howse, wherre he will spending Chreestmus tomorrow! ME thfinks he has landedd own his creepy looking littel edible feeties!! heehee!  He is kwiyte cyoot tho, n ma mummer ees obsesserd wifth him and wantts me to shoow yoo anuther pic!PPffft mummer, MY BLOG OKAYS!?  WUn more piktyoor or no turkeyy fur me apparantly:

Matthew da hairey pig!

I fink dats enuff owf Matt now, aftter mummer maykes me point owt how cyoot his bottom lipp is heehee!  (Mummer dat meens I get summ carrotts n parsnipp now too righyt?!?! heehee)

Movinn own, Ma Uncel Wesley waz wantinn too do tha nativerty play annd thot he shood be Joseph - get tha starrin' roll ya knowz? He kasted Matt as babey Jesus bekuss he wood be happey inn a maynger eetin hay. Uncel Bobby da budgie waz to be the angel flappin his wingos. Ma Auntie S's thfree gold fishies (YUMMERS!), Huey, Duey and (Blind) Lewey werr to bee da thfree wiyse menz. Lewey carnutt see, soo he probably might bee rubbish at follerin da starr! heehee!  Auntie S also hass a pet seegull, naymed Jockkie, whoo was askerd to fly by own occashun! heehee!

Wesley waz left wifth Mary annd da donkeiy to kast, annd too chooze betweein me cussin Poppy-catt andd ME!!  He didnt tfhink eet wood be faiyrz fur me too sitt own da catz bakk so I IZ TO BE DONKEY!!!!!!! and Poppy ees Mary!  I iz also gettern to be da narraytorr! EES TROOO! Uncel Wes extenderd hiz inviyte to Auntie Rowie, too be innkeepper az shes snobby andd wood enjoiy sayern THERRZ NO ROOOM IN MA INN!! heehee! Andd hiz sisterr-in-laww dogg Lucy-da-long-legged wun (shee is a colliee) n shee was askerd to be a cattel whoo is lowing! yeah! Ees troo!

Butt ma poor Uncel Wesley's been havering sleepyless niytes worryin bout tha skript and maiynley cayterin fur awll tha kast, sooo tha nativerty iz off!!! EEt was on agen when I'z suggesterd dat wee awll bring ower own foodies butt Uncel Wez cancellerd eet agen shorttley afterz kus he thfot thatt I'z miyght eet Mary, whoo may in turnz eet both da angle andd da thfree Wiyse mens, wilst he himselff miyght attark da babey Jesus! PPPffff, as iff - Uncel Wes, yoo Worrywortt! heehee! Eees sooo very veriy troo!

Anywhoooz, jusht thott yood liyke an eyedea owf da strees and kayos datt ees da bigg Chreestmus leed up in ma famerly! HEeheehee!

Butt, inn an alternit reallity wherrbyz we may awll gett along, Eet wood look a little sumfin liyke dis:

Drawd by my owns faiyr paw!

 Own dat note, I iz gownna wishh yoo awll a happery happery tiyme! N i'zll be bakk to see yoo awll in da New Yeers! YEAH!

Love n likkers,

Yourr furrend,

Pozery-dog - da hairy Chreestmas elf border terrier girrl! heehee!

(Dis is wheerr I wudd yoosully incklude a prettiy piktyoor owf ma smiylin facey, riyght!? Butt ma mummer gotted a littel bit strippin-happery when shee woz groomin me at da weekernd n I has kiynd owf lostt most owf my gorguss Posie fluffy face looks, I.E. MY ENTIYRE BEERD, n I iz too morterfried to putt up a piktyooor!!! I is wearin a santa beerd fur da resst of da holerday seeson!!!!! FTHANKS MUMMER!!!!!!!)